I cannot stress enough the importance of this tip: to change your relationship, change yourself. While we do not posses the power to change others, we can most definitely change ourselves. If you want your husband to be more romantic, try being more romantic yourself. If you want your girlfriend to show more affection, guess what…show more affection yourself. Give and your shall receive. What is important to note is to not do this with the expectation of immediate return, if you are, you are destined to fail, because you’re doing it for the wrong reason. Give because it feels good to give, not because you want something in return. With time, you shall receive.
“In most relationships, we think, I’m right, you’re wrong, and I’ll try to convince you to change. The truth is, if one person changes,the relationship changes. People say “Why do I have to change?” but when I show them how to tip over the first domino, their only question is “ Why did I wait so long?”
Michele Weiner -Davis, couples therapist and author of The Sex-Starved Marriage